I’ve Seen My Lifetime Disintegrate Before My Eyes

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I’ve seen my lifetime disintegrate before my eyes.

Do you have a recurring dream that you just can’t understand? No, I’m not talking about the one where you realize the final exam is today and you haven’t cracked open the textbook. Nor am I talking about the one where the giant ape is slowly chasing you, but try as you might, you just can’t run.

Those are typical anxiety dreams. They have nothing to do with final exams or giant apes. They’re more likely related to something in your daily life (usually work or some other stress-inducing environment).

Here’s the kind of dream I’m talking about: it involves a familiar landscape, maybe current, maybe from your past. It’s “familiar” in the sense that it evokes the real thing except it’sContinue Reading “I’ve Seen My Lifetime Disintegrate Before My Eyes”

Halloween Memories

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There’s a certain childlike innocence about Halloween. It’s childlike because it’s best captured through the eager eyes of young children. Perhaps no holiday other than Christmas brings forth more enthusiasm than Halloween for youngsters.

Quite possibly, for a kid, it’s tough to say which yields more joy. Christmas certainly has its upside. After all, who can deny the happiness of receiving a roomful of gifts? But, for a child, these gifts come at a cost. You must wear stiff clothes, suffer through a long Mass, and put up with the boredom of even longer dinners with the extended family. All this keeps you from playing Continue Reading “Halloween Memories”

The Anatomy Of A Perfect Speech

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Buchel, Charles A.; Herbert Beerbohm Tree (1852-1917), as Mark Anthony in ‘Julius Caesar’ by William Shakespeare; Theatre Collection; http://www.artuk.org/artworks/herbert-beerbohm-tree-18521917-as-mark-anthony-in-julius-caesar-by-william-shakespeare-30507 Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

Well, isn’t that interesting? It seems last week’s column brought forth a surge of fascination. And curiosity. Several readers requested a more complete example. They wanted to see an actual speech that most effectively employed the three cornerstones of a perfect speech: story weaving, callbacks, and self-deprecating humor.

Oh, there are so many. From Churchill to Reagan to Kennedy, modern orators have used these tools to persuade and entice listeners.

Marc Antony’s eulogy for Julius Caesar in the second scene of Act III of Shakespeare’s play Julius Caesar is a classic example of a speech that uses these elements effectively (see “Story Weaving, Callbacks, and Self-Deprecating Humor,” Mendon-Honeoye Falls-Lima Sentinel, October 17, 2024). Now, I realize it’s probably been a while since high school or since you watched Marlon Brando’s masterful performance as Marc Antony in MGM’s 1953 production of Julius Caesar. So, before we begin, here are the salient parts of Antony’s speech:Continue Reading “The Anatomy Of A Perfect Speech”

Story Weaving, Callbacks, And Self-Deprecating Humor

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Many years ago, a young aspiring columnist asked an established author what it takes to be a writer. “To write, you need to find your pen,” said the wordsmith. “To write well, you need to find your voice.”

“Find your voice?” What does that mean?

I never understood that expression. It seemed like a cop out. It’s what you tell a young buck when you don’t have a real answer. After all, everyone is looking for that magic bullet, that sure-fire secret that makes you a success.

Well, after years of writing, it dawned on me the answer to “How can I be a good writer?” is obvious. You need to find your voice. I can’t tell you what it means, but I can tell you it’s true.

I can, however, tell you what you need to do to find your voice. It’s actually quite simple. You must write. Often. Incessantly. Without regard for the blue pen of the editor.

Eventually, you’ll notice you’ve created a mental template that guides your word craft. You may even have multiple templates if you write in different ways for different audiences. For example, you wouldn’t write a romance novel the same way you write an action-adventure thriller.

What can be said of writing can also be said of speaking. In fact, those “magic” elements you find in good writing also have their place in good speaking. They might come out differently (i.e., writing is often more formal and more structured than speaking), but the concepts remain the same. For example, story weaving, callbacks, and self-deprecating humor engage the audience in ways that can leave a lasting impression. Here’s why:

Story Weaving. As the name implies, this idea most clearly resembles writing. Whether using a pen to extend your voice or using your vocal cords, you’re taking a story and threading it through a larger narrative. In a speech, it isn’t the main subject of the lecture. The drama inherent to this story teases the audience into wanting more. Think of this as leaving several cliffhangers throughout your broader presentation.

Done well, story weaving doesn’t distract from the topic while providing a resonating echo of the theme. It generally presents a metaphor or supporting message to create an emotional connection with your audience.

Abraham Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address and John Kennedy’s inaugural speech both used story weaving in a similar way. They each used their speeches to weave the story of the nation’s founding throughout their primary premise. Lincoln reflected on a nation “conceived in liberty” and “dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal” to emphasize how Gettysburg merely extended the fight for freedom that began with the Revolutionary War. He wanted his audience to embrace the concept that preserving our Union harked back to this shared heritage.

Kennedy, on the other hand, played a more subtle hand. He told the story of the American Revolution to inspire what he called a “new generation of Americans” to carry on the legacy left them by the Founding Fathers. His rhetoric technique had the audience imagine themselves as part of America’s ongoing story. This inspired a patriotic ire that connected our country’s past with the present.

Callbacks. This element works in conjunction with story weaving. Story weaving makes callbacks more effective and more natural to the ears of the audience. A callback refers to something said earlier. Comedians use them on unsuspecting audiences. Oddly, they may seem unrelated to the plot line of a narrative. The very nature of sticking out like a sore thumb, however, makes the principal motif more apparent. Callbacks can be utilized as “Easter Eggs,” inside jokes between the performer and the audience.

The movie Ferris Bueller’s Day Off contains plenty of callbacks to Ferris’ supposed ailment. They appear just in time to further antagonize his sister, who knows he’s playing hooky just to spend a day having fun. Whether it’s being asked to donate to a collection for Ferris’ “surgery” or seeing the water tower with the phrase “Save Ferris,” she’s constantly tormented.

These callbacks remind us that Ferris is breaking the rules. Sure, it’s wrong, but is it that wrong? There’s a certain appeal to the renegade spirit of mavericks who buck the establishment. That’s what Ferris Bueller represents. Every time we see a reference to his lie about being sick, it brings us closer to his character. We are, after all, in on his secret.

You can use callbacks in your speaking to create a rhythm to your presentation that emphasizes your core messages. Callbacks make it more likely that message will stick with the audience.

Self-deprecating Humor. If you notice one thing about these elements we’re discussing, they all encourage audience participation. They draw the audience into your performance. You become more accessible, more likable, and, therefore, more credible.

You might also notice, as we’ve progressed in this essay, they each become more humorous. Story weaving can introduce opportunities to tell jokes. Artfully timed callbacks can bring laughs, too. But nothing works better when it comes to funny as self-deprecating humor.

We’ve all been told to start a talk with a joke. It loosens the audience up. It also loosens you up. But what if you’re not comfortable telling jokes? What if you’re concerned your joke might offend people? Making fun of yourself overcomes both obstacles. Making a joke at your own expense lightens the mood and makes you more relatable. It also reduces the likelihood you’ll offend someone.

Ronald Reagan was a master at self-deprecating humor. He constantly poked fun at his own age. This dampened concern that he was too old to serve as president. He also used his role as a politician to ease anxiety in serious situations. After taking a bullet in a failed assassination attempt, Reagan famously quipped to the doctors about to operate on him, “I hope you’re all Republicans.”

This witty remark not only calmed a nation’s nerves, but it endeared Reagan to the public. The self-deprecating line showed he could remain funny and poke fun at himself, even in the face of adversity. Not many could reduce tension and inspire confidence after being shot.

Self-deprecating humor works because it builds rapport with the audience. It makes you seem humble and approachable. It encourages your audience to connect to you and be supportive of what you’re about to say.

Try incorporating these techniques into your next presentation. Practice weaving a story into the body of your talk. Treat it as a subplot that supports or complements your main story. Find ways to reference what you said earlier with a witty callback or two. Finally, don’t be afraid to make fun of yourself (in an appropriate manner). Starting a speech with self-deprecating humor can be good for you and your audience.

You’ll find these tools reinforce your message and better engage your audience. By strengthening your public speaking skills in this way, you can improve your ability to communicate and connect.

What should you do the next time you want to captivate and move your audience? Use the methods described above. You’ll not only leave the audience smiling, but you’ll be amazed at how satisfied you will become.

We All Thrive When We Balance Between Healthy Competition and Community Harmony

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We are built to compete. It makes us better. It makes our businesses better. It makes our nation better.

Think of the progress we’ve made as a country over almost two-and-a-half centuries. A theme of constant competition weaves throughout that history. The pioneers fought against nature. Early entrepreneurs vied for the same markets. Writers, artists, and other imagineers have confronted their own personal demons to produce outstanding work.

As author Nancy Pearcey said, “Competition is always a good thing. It forces us to do our best.”

Competition works because it drives us. So why do we see some bemoan it? Comedian Continue Reading “We All Thrive When We Balance Between Healthy Competition and Community Harmony”

Should You Slap A Simple Single Or Swing For The Fences?

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Photo by Ulrik on Freeimages.com

This could easily become a column on successful investing, but it’s not. It does, however, reflect a Noble Prize-winning concept that has propelled successful investors for more than half a century. It’s simple. I’ll explain it quickly.

Every investment option possesses two critical factors: risk and return. Scholars credit economist Harry Markowitz as the first to identify the correlation of risk and return. In his 1952 paper “Portfolio Selection,” Markowitz, the father of “Modern Portfolio Theory,” says low-risk investments can yield low returns and high-risk investments must yield high returns. The “can” and “must” refer to the price you should reasonably pay for the investment.

But this column isn’t about successful investing, it’s about life. Specifically, your life. More precisely, the choices you face in your life. Understanding the dichotomy between “low-Continue Reading “Should You Slap A Simple Single Or Swing For The Fences?”

Are You More A Marxist Or A Lennonist?

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Karl Marx (John Jabez Edwin Mayal) and Vladimir Lenin (Unknown, presumably official), Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

During dinner at the recent New York Press Association Publishers’ Conference, talked turned towards the misuse of the term “click-bait.” In a strict sense, the term applies to misleading descriptions of internet links. These phrases “bait” you to “click” the link; hence, “click-bait.” Links that have nothing to do with the sentence that lured you to click makes this technique unethical. That’s why “click-bait” has such a negative connotation.

Copywriters for more than a century have searched for sentences that “sizzle.” Elmer Wheeler documented the early years of this journey in his 1937 book Tested Statements That Sell. If you don’t recall the name of this Rochester native dubbed “America’s Greatest Salesman,” you will certainly know his most famous phrase: “Don’t sell the steak. Sell the sizzle.” (See “Did You Know About This Sizzling Greater Western New York Hidden Gem?Mendon-Honeoye Falls-Lima Sentinel, June 10, 2021).

Whether it’s writing advertising copy, creating newspaper headlines, or crafting book titles, it’s well known certain words and phrases attract awareness. If you want to get someone to read what you write, you need to grab their attention.

This is where the publishers landed at that dinner. They lamented the fact that “click-bait” had given the art of headline writing a bad name. It takes genuine talent to build a headline that gets readers to the first sentence (which is the only goal of a headline). That same talent has a dark side. It’s called “click-bait.” Journalists know the difference between the good and the bad. Readers often don’t. They classify all effective headlines as “click-bait,” even the ones that are simply good headlines.

In the course of this conversation, I mentioned how the headline from last week’s Commentary developed in a way to bring the reader into the article. It was the third week in a row I was writing about an ostensibly Catholic topic, and I didn’t want people thinking I was freelancing for the Catholic Courier. As I described the process (giving kudos to Betsy for strengthening it), I inadvertently referred to the headline as a “title.” Books and chapters have “titles.” Newspaper columns and articles have “headlines.” The other publishers reminded me of this.

What about the headline to this column? You’re probably wondering, “What does any of this have to do with communism?” If this is so, you’re going to be disappointed. Take another look at the above title—er—headline. It, and this column, will talk about Marx and Lennon, but the subject has nothing to do with communism. It has to do with words and how you use them. The individuals referred to in the headline aren’t Karl Marx and Vladimir Lenin, they are Groucho Marx and John Lennon.

Groucho Marx/John Lennon Abkhazia stamp, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

The headline reflects a clever ploy copywriters have traditionally used: the pun. You see fewer punny or poetic headlines. Why? Because the click-bait world demands “honest” and “action-oriented” headlines. This is why you see so many “How To” headlines. They promise to answer a question you have right now.

Using a pun takes away from that. It also sometimes attracts the wrong readers. For example, the above headline might attract people interested in economic theory, not those interested in how they might mimic popular culture figures. Of course, being a print article, readers familiar with this column might expect a twist in the story regardless of the headline. The twist here is it’s not Marx and Lenin, it’s Marx and Lennon.

But that’s not all the headline offers. It’s also provocative. This is where Groucho and John rear their familiar faces. Both made a living using provocative language. Between books and scripts (Groucho) and songs (John), they practiced a refined skill at headline (or title) writing. Both used puns. Both used humor. Both provoked their audience.

They had, however, different objectives. It’s not how they employed the tools of headline writing, it’s what action they intended their audience to take.

Groucho wanted you to smile. Not just once, he wanted you to smile many times. He employed a form of layered comedy, and puns made this easier. You can watch the same scene twice and see the words differently both times. What’s more, both views will leave you laughing, but at completely different things.

TV shows like The Simpsons following in the footsteps of Groucho Marx. Kids will laugh because they see one layer of humor. Adults laugh because they see a different layer. And they’re watching the exact same scene.

When you see Groucho talking either in his game show You Bet Your Life or being interviewed on a talk show, you see a fun-loving man who enjoyed making you laugh.

John Lennon, on the other hand, presented himself as an angry man who wanted you to get angry. This was particularly the case in his solo years, as his Beatles mates likely muted some of his anger.

Superficially, this might reflect a certain type of repellant personality. But Lennon remains a popular icon. Some of his post-Beatles songs express a raw emotion that’s meant to grate the listener. These include Mother, How Do You Sleep?, #9 Dream, and Gimme Some Truth. The titles of his songs might be driven by anger, but, oddly, they also possess hope. Song like Imagine, Instant Karma! (We All Shine On), Happy Xmas (War Is Over), Mind Games, and Give Peace a Chance all fall into this category.

Ironically, Lennon’s song God takes this full circle where he states a litany of “don’t believe” statements meant to irk just about everyone. He concludes “I don’t believe in Beatles. I just believe in me. Yoko and me. That’s reality. The Dream is over. What can I say? The dream is over. Yesterday. I lost the dream weaver, but now I’m reborn. I was the walrus, but now I’m John. And so, dear friends, you’ll just have to carry on. The dream is over.”

If that doesn’t provoke you, well, then you were never a fan of The Beatles. Still, it’s an effective provocation because it achieves what Lennon seeks.

So, who are you more like? Groucho Marx or John Lennon?

For me, I’m more “Starr”y-eyed. (As in Ringo Starr.) I just want to get along with everyone.

Ringo Starr, dearMoon, CC BY 3.0 <https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0>, via Wikimedia Commons

Did The Pope Just Endorse A U.S. Presidential Candidate?

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Francis visits a favela in Brazil during World Youth Day 2013. Source: Tânia Rêgo/ABr, CC BY 3.0 BR <https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/br/deed.en>, via Wikimedia Commons

On the face of it, the answer is “no.” But if you dig a little deeper into what the leader of the Catholic Church is reported to have said, you might begin to wonder.

Several media outlets on Friday, September 13, 2024, reported Pope Francis said regarding the upcoming U.S. presidential election, “Not voting is ugly. It is not good. You must vote.” As to who you should vote for, Francis said, “You must choose the lesser evil. Who is the lesser evil? That lady, or that gentleman? I don’t know. Everyone, in conscience, (has to) think and do this.”

Sounds perfectly reasonable, right? Maybe he was taking a page out of Patrick Mahomes and Caitlin Clark, both of whom avoided endorsing either candidate and simply reminded Continue Reading “Did The Pope Just Endorse A U.S. Presidential Candidate?”

Remembering Father Latus

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Father Charles Latus presides over the first Wedding Mass celebrated at the new opened St. Catherine’s Church in the hamlet of Mendon, NY on September 28, 1991.

My father and brother erected the family estate with their own hands. After a long search my parents found a perfect parcel on which to build. While I toiled away deskbound in some distant cubicle, the other men in the family conveyed materials in a beat-up Ford pick-up to the site. Reminiscent of “Carosa and Son” (the masonry business started by my grandfather with my father riding shotgun), the two constructed a home of their dreams.

Oddly, it wasn’t their dream home. That would come decades later.

Coincidentally, they located both homes in the Town of Mendon. The first was the ideal family home. The second was the ideal home for retirement.

That first home was more than the “ideal” family home, it was the last home that housed the entire family – Mother, Father, two adult sons, a high school daughter and an elementary school daughter. We were all there. Until the company my father worked for decided to shut down the Rochester office and transfer him to Albany.

But that’s another story. This is a story about melding into a community.

We quickly adopted Mendon as our home. There are three things that make a community a Continue Reading “Remembering Father Latus”

Faith, Reason, And The Shroud Of Turin

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Image of Shroud of  Turin showing positive and negative displays by source: Dianelos Georgoudis, CC BY-SA 3.0 https:creativecommons.org licenses by-sa3.0, via Wikimedia Commons

As the “science guy” in school, I got a lot of questions. They weren’t science questions, unless it was for answers on the high school chemistry exam. (And they were asked during the actual taking of the exam!) No, my friends usually asked me questions about science fiction.

That irked me.

OK, so here’s something many people didn’t know about me back then. As much of a Trekker that I was (and still am – but only for Star Trek: TOS), I was no fan of science fiction. Sure, I liked 2001: A Space Odyssey (the movie, I hated the book). Yes, I read Isaac Asimov’s I Robot (during catechism class at St. Pius because I was bored, and it was on the bookshelf I sat next to).

But, in general, I found most science fiction too dystopian, too depressing, and, well, too Continue Reading “Faith, Reason, And The Shroud Of Turin”

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